Sad Times at the Ranch =/

So we went back this weekend to get started on painting. Forgot the spackle for the holes on the walls. Started painting anyway because we're moving in next weekend. Still no a/c. Spent most of our time running away from/battling mutant wasps from hell that attacked us and/or got stuck to the paint on the walls as a result of leaving the windows open to cool down the house. Windows have no screens. sad sad sad and I could go on forever.
But let's start from the beginning....

We pulled up and I immediately jumped out of the truck and ran to search for the dog. She was in the thing some assholes mistakenly treated as a dog house. We haven't been able to go out there until now because it costs $40.00 to get there a pop..and we had no money to go check on the dog sooner than that...moving on; my dude had to rip the roof off the shit hole dog house to get Amanda out and she was half dead. She'd had her puppies, who's death we could smell but couldn't locate the source of..so I sat in the yard and bathed her in the cold water we brought, held her and held her and cried. Just writing about is seriously bringing tears to my eyes. God bless that precious dog. She's starving to death, and just gave birth..and still had it in her to wag her tail when she saw us. Holy crap the sorrow. I'm waaay to emotional sometimes. =/ She's the kind of dog that my pappaw would take out to the woods and shoot. Eff you PETA/Animal Irrationalists btw. It's selfish to put a dog through thousands of dollars of care that may or may not work to make yourself feel better. And I'm not here to argue this point.

In any case, we had to take today off from working on the house today due to lack of funds and will be going back tomorrow once the bank releases our $ that was stupidly deposited last week. I'll be searching for Miss Amanda and feeding her baby rice and some other bland baby food to help get her back on her feet. I'm doing everything I can within my means to save this dog because it's what good people do. I would've brought her home with me but she'd wandered off by the time we got ready to go and we couldn't find her. But I did leave out food (which she probably can't eat at this point) and two HUGE bowls of water for her that will surely last until I get back tomorrow night. But man I'm anxious.

On Monday, we'll be finishing painting the walls and ripping out as much carpet as we can before sundown...no electricity yet so we gotta bust ass to get it done. But I have a serious tendency to digress, so let me lay some stuff out here.

I'm a single mother living on about 20k per year. I got a little brother that's my biggest fan, and a boyfriend that I love desperately that loves me and my daughter just as much that's working his ass off for us...and that's it. Basically, I have no support and am doing this on a very, very limited budget.

This is coupled with the fact that the house is seriously trashed. You can't tell from the pictures but it is. Holes in the walls, the wood strips (sorry don't know their names) on the corners of the walls are falling off, easy to nail back up I know.

The carpet needs to be ripped up. In the master bedroom there's a serious hole in the floor where the particle sub-flooring is all effed up and you can see outside. It's not a huge hole and we can cover it very easily.

The master bathtub leaks so bad we have to replace the flooring in the bathroom, which is understandable and normal but also means that we have to go under the house and find out what's leaking and why. Thank God the pipes are plastic and cheaply and easily replaced.

The house needs leveled. The skirt on the back half needs to be replaced, as there is none at the present time. We can't afford a lawnmower right now and there's chiggers.

By themselves, these tasks are easily fixable. But looking at the sum total ... it's pretty scary. We need a drill and a circular saw fer sure. We have to time our move because I don't get paid until the middle of the week and the electric and water needs to be turned on. And it's stifling in there with no A/C. If next winter is as bad as this past winter, we gotta get going on getting some heat as well. In order to fix the central air, this will require repair of the ducting underneath of the house.

I gotta get May enrolled in daycare and school.
This does not = easy by any means. We didn't expect it to either.
And honestly, I could have a brand new home hauled out there and trash this piece of crap like now if I wanted to. But there's a bigger point here.

This work will enable me and May and my dude to look back and say:
'We did it. This proves we're capable.'

It builds character for sure. It will teach us to value what we have as it's truly a gift from God that we've proven that we respect and are thankful for. In 2 1/2 years the land and home will be paid off, which means 6k per year extra that will be leverage for retirement, May's college education..and so much more.

But it's hard. I know people have done what we're doing in the past but I get so anxious knowing everything that needs to be done and I don't have the means to complete it but piece meal every pay day.

At this point, we're going to be buying plywood to patch the holes in the floor instead of replacing it all. It'll suck when we finally get the $400.00 it's gonna take to buy all the wood we need to replace all the flooring in the house because that'll mean tearing up the retardicon patches we're putting in which will mean more work.


siiiiiigh.
This is some rough ass bidness.